CANT SLEEP HUH?

it's 4:48

yeah, actually i was done watching a movie, The Proposal, it's such a nice movie..

but somehow, i did ran to my room, well, i guess, i need to sleep, but, i just can't

all of sudden. i keep thinking, what am i doing all this time, i keep thinking about him.. OH! how FOOLISH am i!

there's something you should know about girls, how strong they are in your eyes, how high their egoes are, somehow n somewhere in their soul, is WEAKNESS

they are sensitve, emotional, and somehow..they are CLUMSY, yeah, that part goes to me, actually

i was lying on my bed just now, really not preparing to sleep, but, it got me thinking, how am i gonna stop thinking about this? this is too tiring, but somehow, everything i do, remind me of him..

that is just SUCKS!

well... i think i got myself busy enough, yeah, keep me busy, distract me with something else other than him...

so i go for shop, but still, he came across my mind even when i look at someone who wears the same clothe as him,

then, i spend hours, cleaning my dad's office, with all those papers, files and books, BUT STILL, i came across of him, when my bro tell me about his studies in Jordan, well,my bro really remind me of him, well, i dont know which part.. i can't tell myself [what am i thinking, really]

then, i really think this plan is gonna work, SLEEP.... wait up, im not finish....FOR HOURS! i even woke up at 2 p.m this morning,i mean, EVENING [haha, yeah, i'm THAT kinda girl] , BUT SOMEHOW, THAT LIL MEAN CREATURE manage to get into my dreams!

trust me, this is for real, how am i gonna run away from this?? i even dreamt of him at night.. well, mostly he is just a cellphone in my dream [well, i kinda had too much texting, and somehow i manage to dream of him calling me, as it's so real, haha]

what is this about? what is this on my mind?? i can't really tell what is it? CAN YOU?

something just popped in my mind just now as i land my back on that soft bed..

I NEED TO MOVE ON

yeah, that's always the answer..well, i manage to handle it very well last time, [yeah, that RUDY guy] and i'm so proud of it, coz now, i'm sure, it was just a CRUSH

but now, i'm not so sure what it is, coz you see, i never had such joy when i am with someone.. to tell u the truth,this is the 1st time,

i even step out from my comfort zone, ready to try something new, with him.. it's quite fun, and i loved it.. he explore me, well, not much, but he kinda lead me to it.. i explore the real me inside, when i am with him, i'll be more, open, i do something i never did , he is such evil! haha, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME? hahaha

i dont even know if this feeling was right, but i SWEAR to you, every single thing i type here, i can feel the burnt in my heart, i can feel it in my chest, i think it's flaming wild fire in there, GREAT, now i have to call the firemen, hehe, kid2

last but not least, HELP ME FIND SOMEONE NEW TO CRUSH ON, coz i swear to god, this man is like a leech on my heart, really hard to get it off,

hurrm... honestly, there's some lil thing inside me, that really wanted me to let him go, but some part of me, WONT LET HIM GO, i kinda like the feeling of liking him , really

normal, isn't it?

SLEEP TIGHT , ppl

HOT! HOT!

I can't melt you down huh? your melting point is too high ,huh?

what you're trying to say is that ; no matter how hard i try, i can never get your heart huh?

well... if i can't MELT you down, let see if i can FIRE you UP,

i BET you'll be FLAMING HOT, and burnt yourself up, or maybe, burn into ashes..

YOU'RE MESSING WITH THE WRONG GIRL, HON

IM CAPABLE OF CRASHING ALL THE BARRIERS THAT ARE IN MY WAY.. ;)

I NEED SOME AIR!

*Sigh*

I admit it, it is too OBVIOUS that i've been trying too hard to make he SEES me, to make he LIKES me, LIKES my STYLE, LIKES me the way I AM, but.. ALL OF SUDDEN, i dont really realize, that, i've been trying to hard to be SOMEONE else, SOMEONE he probably LIKES, someone that is not..ME

Maybe i should take a break..

TAKE A BREAK FROM ALL OF THIS

this thing, is SO TIRING, i'm trying too hard to get his attention, all of sudden, HE NEVER GETS IT, he just dont get it, HE'S TOO INNOCENT, EMPTY, BLURR, or should i say, DUMB?

WHY ON EARTH DID I EVER LIKE HIM AT THE FIRST PLACE??

ENOUGH! I'M SO TIRED!

just let me breathe for just one moment, let me catch my air, let me just think what the best for me for just ONE MOMENT..

LET ME BE ME...

MY TURN TO MEREPEK :)

ntah kenape and ntah hape yg aku bebel2 kan dgn assila anak haji che mazlan tuh, sampai aku mencoret2 kan segale imaginasi aku tentang FUTURE life aku,

well, mostly, overall, we did talked about LOVE and MARRIAGE , [we are girls, that's so normal!].. well also note that, the current guy we fall in love with [mine is Mr.Apple] doesnt really THERE, in our future imagination.. hurmm...

honestly speaking, i dont really see me marrying mr.Apple, well, i could wonder, IF i marry him, but, when i think about it, NO, but, who knows eh? so there's no HIM in my imagination..

haha, weird eh?

anyway,let's the NUYU in the Wonderland start!

haha, just because Assila n me says that, kitorang tak nampak sgt future kitorang, yg kitorang neh, kawen, ade anak, bla2, stakat neh, kitorang just nampak, KERJA..

hoho! aku, ARCHITECT , perrghh.. time tuh [time kat sini merujuk kepade future aku,] aku SLIM, haha, badan cun gilaa, pegi keje pon, perghh, pakai suit, n bergaye sakan! hoho!, *meleleh2 air lior imagine*

aku imagine, aku tinggi sket, [hey! it's my brain, i can think watever i like, korunk, just tadah mate je la..haha] KAHKAHKAHKAH, [nampak sgt aku neh pendek, haha] or maybe, tinggi kes bantuan kasot tumit tinggi, but, aku salu pegi ke site, narat nak pegi sane pakai heels, hurrm, then, aku rase, aku hitam dah sket, a lil bit tanned, kes, da slalu sgt berjemor, haha, part paling best..

aku ckp kat assila, aku time tuh, dah bertunang, and guess who is my tunang? haha, HE'S MY BOSS, or partner besar dlm syarikat, or kawan sepejabat, yg ade pangkat tggi gak, haha, [kene tempias crita2 melayu, haha] well, aku imagine, dy sorang yg tinggi, pakai suit pegi keje, briefcase, pakai spek, puteh2, rambot belah 2, hoho! ntah sape ntah..

then, bile lunch, kitorang pegi makan same2, kadang2, aku bawak bekal, mkn dlm office, berdue2an, kihkihkih, then talks NOTHING ABOUT WORK, it's forbidden when we spent time together, haha..

kami berdue matured, hehe, and bersikap professional, hehe, time meeting, kami serius, KAHKAHKAH , tade nak men kenyit2 mate neh, haha, but, kalo idea dy bercanggah ngan aku, aku bantah, tanpe segan silu, hoh! I DONT CARE, haha [CEYYWAAHH, DIRECTOR! come on! HIRE me!]

ish, then, lepas habes keje, dy anta i balik umah u know, hehe, kami nak kawen bile umah idaman kami siap, kahkahkah, MELAMPAU! haha

CUKOP2, ntah sape ntah yg aku byg neh, aku dlm imaginasi aku tuh pon, dah takde rupe aku dah, ish ish ish, trok btol la budak NUYU neh, haha

sekian, kini aku mahu melabuhkan tirai theater ku ini, hehe

terima kaseh kerane sudi melayan karenah si anak kecil ini, kihkih

MARRY ME, ROMEO

WILL YOU, MUHAMMAD HANIF BIN HASSAN, BE MY LAWFUL WEDDED BACKUP HUSBAND, WHEN I'M 30 AND NOT YET MARRIED?

YES, I DO

kahkahkah, itu lah kami, CUTE KAN?

[sorry anip, aku lupe nak wat satu post khas utk ko, adekah post ini terlambat?]

*ini anip, dan anak beliau, kahkahkahkah*

Name : ANIP

Age : 18 [huh? say nothing]

apekah anip?

anip ialah seorg jejake yg :

always be there when i need a shoulder to cry on [not literally a shoulder]

always be a good ear to hear all my nonsense, [bout guys...love..blablabla]

always be a good friend to give me all the great advices

always takes me up when i'm down faaarrrr below

bile kah aku kenal si anip ini, and bagaimana..?

[eceh, mcm interview la plak]

well, lepas exam SPM, aku n ash chatting2, and decide nak check jawapan for EST objective paper, then, dy nak heret sorg kawan dy [anip] to discuss lah, hurm, mule2 aku igtkan anip ni pompuan, [hahaha, ntah nape aku pikir cantu] [well, kes aku ade kwn name aniq, alah, same je la kan, haha]

then, kami jadi kamcing kes si ash ni pegi PLKN, cet.. anip ni, kire, tempat aku mengadu dikale ash tiade disisi ku, kahkah

then, one things lead to the other, kami jdi, bestbuds..

crite kami complicated.. ade suatu saat tuh, tgh aku yg kepale agak tak btol, and dy tgh hot2 in love, kami same2 gile to each other, haha.. LAWAK SIAL :))

then, we settle down sudah, everything back to normal, he even got himself a girlfriend, haha, aku ni, POMPUAN SIMPANAN dy je... well, I'M GLAD,you know! haha

haha, kami make a pack, more like a contract, that says :

when im 30, and not yet married, he will marry me [kene tempias citer FRIENDS la neh]

even kalo dy dah kawen, dy kene kawen ngan aku, as his second wife, MIAHAHAHA

BUT, kalo aku dah kawen, dy takleyh la nak kawen ngan aku, even if he's still single when he's 29/30 ..haha [tak fair langsong.. haha, alah, judgement calls!]

DEAL!

I LOVE YOU ANIP, WITH ALL OF MY HEART!

hahahaha!

*P/S: in case you guys misunderstands whatsoever, anip is not Mr.Apple, WEIRD eh?*

OH! COME ON!

TAKE A BREAK, WILL YA?!

penat aaah!! penat!! ko da tau, aku tak suke layan manusia yg seriously randomly tembak menembak number neh, bile aku tak layan, berduyun2 ko msg aku... kalo dah dekat berpuloh2 msg ko anta tu, aku tak layan, phm2 senirik je lah, DESPERATE sgt kah? well, aku tak seDESPERATE anda, I GOT LIFE

aku smlm, ikhlas setulus hati aku, mintak maaf kat ko, and, dgn berani lagi agak kurang aja aku ckp, "aku tak penah ikhlas kawan ngan ko, selame neh, segale ape yg aku penah ckp kat ko, tipu belake, tade yg betolnye, kes aku tak percayekan kwn yg random2, tembak2, thru sms...so, better not contact me again, im so sorry" [something like that]

then, i thought, i was free, i told you everything, now it is just up to you, to forgive me or not, BUT, instead, you keep sending me all msges i ever sent to you, OH MY GOODNESS! ISN'T THAT JUST ANNOYING?

PLEASEEEE, TAKE A BREAK! I'M SURE YOU GOT LIFE OTHER THAN TEXTING RANDOM PEOPLE AREN'T YOU?

ISSUES!

dedicated to Mr.Apple

[yup, im still not done with him..]

Sometimes
I Feel like I’m going out of
My mind,

Boy the way you do me is a
damn crime,

But then you smile at me
and its all right,

With you there aint nothin' in between,

Every time that I walk out the door,
Tell myself I can't take it no more,

There’s a part of me won't let you go
Keep saying yes when my minds saying no

Chorus:
Me and my heart we got issues,
Don’t know if I should hate you or miss you,
Damn, I wish that I could resist you,
Can't decide if I should slap you or kiss you.
Me and my heart we got issues, issues, issues.
We got issues, issues, issues.

Its so wrong, boy you leave me hangin' for so long,
You empty out my love until its all gone,
You change the words but still it's the same song,
I’m tired of the melody.

Change my number and throw out your clothes,
But my feelings for you, it still shows,
I keep building the walls round my heart,
But then I see you, and it all falls apart...

Why fight it, cant hide it
Truth is I think I like it,
Confusion, illusions
Still I don’t know which way to go….

SI PENDEK YG MEMBEBEL ♥

♥ Oh ASSILA ♥



SI BESAR RINDU AMAT KAT SI KECIK :P

JUST STAY

nonton FRIENDS lagi, randomly pick up an episode from season 8, when Joey thinks he falls in love with Rachel, when he tried to tell Chandler and Monica, they both wrongly guess that the FRIEND that Joey falls in love is Pheobe, so Monica talks to Pheobe, what Pheobe said is, [what interest me the most to jot down here is...]

Monica : It's Joey
Pheobe : Really? Joey? [bla bla bla...]
On the one hand, "MOTHER! MAY I?!" but... you know, on the other hand.. "NO!".. No, I can't, we're friends, NO! OH NO! I DONT WANNA RISK WHAT WE HAVE..

that's what i think, i dont wanna risk what we have, i try hard to reconcile with him, i dont wanna risk anything towards it, i keep telling myself :

"STAY IN THE MOMENT, THIS IS ALL WHAT YOU GOT"

so, JUST STAY

ARTI SAHABAT

.....DEDICATED TO MY BELOVED FRIEND.....

ASIAH ROSEDI

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx



tak mudah untuk kita hadapi
perbedaan yang berarti
tak mudah untuk kita lewati
rintangan silih berganti

kau masih berdiri
kita masih di sini
tunjukkan pada dunia
arti sahabat

kau teman sehati
kita teman sejati
hadapilah dunia
genggam tanganku

tak mudah untuk kita sadari
saling mendengarkan hati
tak mudah untuk kita pahami
berbagi rasa di hati

kau adalah..
tempatku membagi kisahku
kau sempurna
jadi bagian hidupku
apapun kekuranganmu

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

well... to my beloved friend Asiah.. LISTEN

whatever happens, dont let go of my hand [pick up lines, kihkih]
belaja leklok, remember, it is what you always wanted, once you got it, dont ever waste it over..
it's not about friendship, it's not about love, but it's about your future..
i will surely pray for you success, what's a friends want for her friend other than her success?
remember me always,make sure we keep in touch..
internet connects us easy, as much as we started this meaningful n beautiful friendship..ryte?
so, Facebooking is a must! (whenever you're free la, dont go online all the time! u need to study meh!)
dont wanna go jiwang on you, kihkih... :P

i dont know if you knew this already, but, i wanna say it once again..that..

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!
TODO EL CORAZON!
(with all of my heart)